I love you very much, my son, a lot.

Posted on June 16, 2013
Location: London
I love you very much, my son, a lot.

Mein tumse, bahut pyar karta hoon bête! Bahut pyar karta hoon. Baas, Baas keh nehin saka.In dus saloan mein, har din, har paal, maine tumhein kitna yaad kiya hey. Itna yaad kiya ke, dil kiya ke, mein tumhe gale laga ke keh sakoon, ke mein tumhein kitna pyar karta hoon. Baas keh nehin saka.


English Translation of above: I love you very much, my son, a lot. Just, Just that I couldn’t say it/show it. But everyday & every second in last 10 years, I thought about, wished I could hug you and tell you how much I loved you and missed you in last ten years.

Remember these lines from the blockbuster Hindi movie “Kabhi Khusi Kabhi Gaam” in 2002? Whole India felt the emotion and perhaps shredded a lot of tear watching this final scene from the movie, me no exception…even today I felt it.

Amazing how true it is! Often I ask this question, why a father, IS NOT ABLE to show his kids, how much he loves them, as effortlessly as a mother. And when it comes to a father with Indian background; in earlier years then when rituals/customs affected our social behaviour –fathers had additional constraints in showing their affection to their son/daughter DIRECTLY, because being strict/reserved with your kids was a known custom for every father in India. I feel it is continuing even to some extent, even today.

Does not help; when knowing/unknowingly – we compare the LOVE of a FATHER & MOTHER for their children. This is absolutely ludicrous. How can anyone do that? Hello? Anyone sensible out there! Even today – look at the adverts, articles, magazines, debates – it is everywhere; how mother’s love is better than father’s love. May be! I don’t know. Haven’t thought about it. But why torture the little mind of the children, with these valueless comparisons? And what is the purpose? Again divide the society, with another aspect, after colour, religion, gender, country and now FATHER & MOTHER’s love? Great! I like the way my friend Reggie says “I am saying Nothing!”

To me, the way, a father and mother show their love is different (may be). But in terms of the volume/intensity of the love, I don’t think there is any difference.

As a child and until now – I always wished my father said those few magic words to me affectionately, which every son wants to hear from a father. But we never shared a vocal relationship. Not that he is a bad father. He had done enough for me and I am indebted to him for my life. I wouldn’t be where I am today, without my father’s support. I know he loves me, every father does.

But I have decided, I am going to be a little different father for Rishi. I love showering him with affections/affectionate words; ever he gets irritated at times. He says; “Papa, I am not a Baby – why you calling me Baby?”. To which, I say, “Rishi, I’ll always call you a baby, when you are a big boy like me”. But why papa, why? I love putting oil in his hair. I love giving him bath, dressing him up. I love listening to him, WITHOUT SAYING A THING! It’s just a thought of Rishi, brings tears in my eye instantly. I can’t see him crying or being sad. I can’t say no to him for anything – even that means SPOILING. I can’t be a strict dad. If that means a bad thing – may that be. I know, I am teaching my son, LOVE & AFFECTION – which is the “MOST IMPORTANT POSSESION in the world” I am not saying this, it is written in Hindu holy book “GITA”.

And I also tell this to Rishi, ALWAYS. That “Rishi, you don’t have to afraid of anything or anyone because your PAPA can fix anything and everything.” Then Rishi asks me: “Papa, if I have fever, will you be able to fix it” and I say: “Of course I can, I just need to touch you and your fever is gone”. Because whether it is a fever or that boy scaring you in the school are all afraid of your father. Because your father is the most powerful, most powerful in the world but Nama Nama (God) is more powerful than your papa. Then Rishi asks: “only you are powerful Papa? And Namo Namo is powerful, not me? I want to be powerful as well”. He is just amazing, so precious and most valuable possession I have in my life. It brings so much goodness in me, with just a thought of Rishi….the Sage! Love you son! I know you are so little that you can’t say “Happy Father’s day to me” but I’ll wait for that day eagerly. Lots of love.

Happy Father's Day to all the Dads out there.

How about I let you hear some of my favourite tracks from childhood, on the father’s day.

Bikash MohantyBikash Mohanty"Welcome to my website!
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